Forever Doesn't Exist
by YuKiyOrA
Summary: "I'm sorry, Sakura. It's just that I know you enough to know you're not my type."  Sasusaku


Disclaimer: The Anime/Manga Naruto does not belong to me. Neither do the characters. But this is a fanfic, so the story's mine! ;P

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><p><strong>FOREVER DOESN'T EXIST<br>**

You know how couples in love always tell each other "I'll love you forever?" I don't believe in that. Not anymore at least. I believe in the now, the moment, this very second. So when I decided to confess to my close friend who I got even closer with during the school trip, I didn't expect to get rejected. I thought it was the perfect moment! And I got rejected right in the face too.

I mean, I know I'm not exactly the prettiest, with my thick black rimmed glasses covering the charm of my eyes, my pink bangs sheltering my wide forehead and my preference of wearing pants to a dress, but I really thought I was the closest girl to him and that maybe, he likes me back like how I liked him.

I even searched the internet on how to confess! And I chose the simplest and most effective way! To do it when the time is right, when the feeling is right, with confidence, a smile, and knowing the answer. Or, at least I thought I knew. Who knew that these kinds of you thought the guy likes you so you fell for him and when you tell him he actually doesn't like you stories really do exist…

Thinking about the rejection just makes me more tears flow down my eyes. The embarrassment, the stress, the anxiety of not knowing what to do next. Where do I go from here? Can I move on? 'Cause right now, my heart is hurting and the pain is enough that I'm scared it might stop beating any second soon. It's like there's a knife stuck in there. And it's making me feel worse because I'm thinking too much that I'm going to have a headache.

Sasuke, how can you be so heartless, am I even something in your heart? Do I have a special place? Why am I heartbroken and so alone and you're perfectly happy all the time?

_ [[fdx]]_

"Hey, Sasuke, I think I might like you." We were in a heated conversation when it suddenly slipped out my tongue.

"Uhh… Sakura, did I just hear you say what I think you said?"

"Maybe? What did you hear?" If his response is as such, I think my chances are rather low, don't cha think?

"I'm sorry, Sakura. It's just that I know you enough to know you're not my type."

"Oh. Okay, let's get to lunch, I'm hungry!" And I just brushed aside my feelings for him, even though my heart is shot by his gun and it's bleeding. I managed to change to subject and we head for lunch like normal close friends.

I wanted to breakdown and cry there and then. I really really wanted to cry. But his fanclub of girls would just laugh at me; the jocks will make fun of me, and him? He'll most likely just stand there and watch me cry. He doesn't know how to comfort a friend… so how do you comfort someone you've just rejected?

_[[fdx]]_

Is he feeling guilty? Will he think of me sometimes? Think of the confession I've made, think of what I must be going through? Is he still willing to be my friend? I'm scared. Everything's so blurry and I'm so afraid of love. Can I ever give up?

And deep down, I know my answer. In my heart, I always know the answer to that question. I know, that's why it hurts me more. I can't give up. I know I can never move on unless I've failed completely and totally. I know that no matter what, my heart will always have a soft spot for him, and whenever I see him, I will just melt. It's something I can't get over. He's something I can't get over.

I cry harder. Cry out all my heart, my tears, my pain. I'll cry them all out and after, I know I have to be strong and fight for love. Fight for my heart, and live out my happiness. But this all starts with me. I have to become stronger. I need to be more confident, more one of a kind. Something he can never ever reject again. In the meantime, I'll happily be his close friend. I will be happy.

Look into the mirror, Sakura. What do you see? I see a fairly good-looking girl with unique pink hair, pretty emerald eyes, and bangs too long. Oh! My bangs overgrown! Haircut time!

Look into the mirror, Sakura. What do you see? I see a good-looking lady with unique pink hair, pretty emerald eyes, perfect bangs, petite height and a fit body. But I can be stronger. Better. I'm definitely going for a run everyday. Keep fit, healthy, and happier too. And I'm running to become a stronger person.

_[[fdx]]_

"Dinner later, Sakura? With Naruto, Neji and Gaara?" Sasuke is asking for a close friend gathering. It's normal. We do this almost everyday. I'm glad. I'm content that he didn't push me away like other normal guys do to girls they don't like. I'm happy to still be his friend. But yes, my heart beats for him. Everytime it sees him, it leaps, and pumps faster. I feel nervous, yet comfortable at the same time. I'm scared, but I feel safe, with him around. It's a sad story. But it will and can be a happier one. If only he could gave me a chance. If only he was willing to try…

"Okay, see 'ya later!" I hanged up. I must try to act like we're close friends, normal friends.

"Hello, Sakura, did you just hang up on me?" Oops, he noticed. Right, he was always the invincible one, the one in control, the great Uchiha Sasuke. And me? I'm just someone who got rejected by him. But this first rejection will be my last. I won't give up!

"Uhh… maybe…?" Wait. Why did he call back? Did it matter that whether I hanged up on him? Or am I over thinking things again? I have a bad habit of over analyzing too much about my life.

"Yeah. I haven't finished, annoying girl. Hinata's coming. She's with Naruto." Oh. Annoying. It's like his vocabulary is so limited he has to call me that. I'm starting to feel depressed again. But a girl? Really! I'm a woman! A lady! Relax, Sakura… he's not worth it. Sing your song in your head "when I see his face, I feel like slapping it everyday". Breathe…

"Okay, okay, irritating boy." Ha! Back at you, loser!

"Whatever, bye." Did he mind that I called him a boy? I want to say I'm sorry, but he deserves it. What do I do? What do I say? Quick, Sakura! He's hanging up!

"I'm sor—" The line went dead. Sigh, why is it always so difficult with him? Can't I just be with him? Why can't he love me like I love him? Why did it have to be him? Why can't I get over, still…?

_[[fdx]]_

Look into the mirror, Sakura. What do you see? I see a heartbroken lady. She is beautiful, with unique pink hair, emerald eyes, perfect body, and just nice bangs. Inside her, I see sadness, I see struggles. But I can also see happiness somewhere deep within, and confidence. Lots of confidence.

Time to lose the fake glasses, Sakura, you don't need to hide anymore. Time to be myself and show the world my worth. Time to make Uchiha Sasuke realize that he loves me all along. I know this, because I know if I'm special to him, the only reason for him to reject me is because love is foreign to him.

And I know I have a place in his heart because I realised he doesn't have any other female friends, and sometimes, I catch him staring at me for no reason, he treats me to ice cream sometimes, chat random crap with me, put up with my bipolar and sends me to my bus stop everyday. It's in his actions, and I was so blind. There must be a reason for him to reject me. And I know it's not because I'm not his type. He was lying. And I figured all this out only today. Only now. I'm so stupid.

Mint-colored shirt? Check. Black skinny jeans? Check. Fake black rimmed glasses? Check. Sea green converse shoes? Check. Wallet, handphone, headphones, house keys? Check. Out the door I go.

When I'm reaching the door of the restaurant, I saw him, already there, leaning against the wall like some model, dressed in his usual style- midnight blue shirt, black jeans, and black converse. My heartbeat becomes faster and I'm feeling very happy and excited to see him. I look onto the ground and walk towards him, feeling nervous, 'cause we're alone again. At least for now.

I gave him a smile I only reserved for him, and leaned against the wall beside him.

"Where're the others?"

"Not sure."

"Oh. Okay, so you wanna call them? Or I'll call them?"

"Wait. Stand in front of me again."

"For what?" I raised my brows and gave a small laugh, then I walked to where I was when I smiled at him. Is something good going to happen to me? Please, let it be something good. I want his heart…

"Close your eyes." I closed my eyes, and trusted him. What more can I lose? Then, I felt that my glasses were gently pried from me. By instinct, I opened my eyes.

What I saw, made my heart warmed up. No one has ever made me feel like this with such a simple action. I feel my eyes welled up with tears. Sasuke is wearing my glasses. He saw through me. He knew.

"Just what I thought. They're fake. Why did you hide them? Why did you hide your eyes from me? Why do you need to lie?" He looked hurt, yet in his eyes, I saw forgiveness. He forgives me.

"Why did you reject me? Why do you have to lie?" I need to hear his truthful answer. I want to hear his honest answer. From his delicate lips.

"Your eyes, they're beautiful. And you're beautiful. But forever doesn't exist and so love doesn't last either. But I wanted to know you're serious. And along the way, I fell more in love with you. But we can't be together. I don't—"

He stopped. I looked at him. I looked into his eyes, and felt his sadness. His insecurities. His fear. My tears threatened to fall out but I pushed them back in. I'm strong. And I'm strong enough to make Sasuke strong too. I hugged him. I hugged him tightly and whispered into his ears.

"You're right. Forever doesn't exist. I don't believe in that too. But I believe in the now, the moment, this very second. And now, this very second, this very moment, I'm in love with you. So we can't be together, but we should. We must."

I felt him stiffen, and then relaxed. And then I heard a low chuckle.

"Sakura, I… I think I'm ready love you back. 'Cause right now, I'm in love with you too."

Tears escaped my eyes. If there was a happiest moment of my life, it would be now. Hugging Sasuke tightly in my arms. Sasuke, my best friend, boyfriend and whose heart belongs to me.

"Oh! And I'm sorry about the fake glasses. I wanted as little attention as possible from other guys."

"Drop it. From now on, there'll be a guardian angel beside you everyday."

I smiled the brightest smile I've had for a few months.

Remember how couples in love always tell each other "I'll love you forever?" I don't believe in that. I believe in the now, the moment, this very second. And this very second, this very moment, Sasuke and I are in love.

**_[Forever doesn't exist.] _**


End file.
